I have had a number young, female patients of late who are struggling to reach orgasm during sex. Nice women, in good relationships who are frustrated that they aren`t reaching orgasm during intercourse. Forget what you are seeing on the porn sites (shove it in, bang away for hours, and she`s moaning in Ecstasy). Unless you have trained your vagina to reach a G spot orgasm, or are stimulating her clitoris, she`s not going to be anywhere close to reaching orgasm.
These women are often surprised by the fact that only 30% of women regularly reach orgasm during intercourse. I`m getting the slack-jawed, `what do you mean most women don`t climax during intercourse?…`reaction. She comes first is a good rule of thumb. I try to explain that typically couples will engage oral sex and loads of foreplay first. Unless you get the right position, she`s up for a ride on top, you`ve got some help in the form of fingers, we vibe or vibrating cock ring, her clit is tucked up high and neglected.
I offer a couple of suggestions for women struggling with orgasms.
1. Get some clitoral orgasm cream to open up the blood flow to your genitals
2. Add a vibrator to your bedside table and get yourself stimulated before you engage in intercourse
3. Female on top position, or `closed-legs missionary“ gives you the best options for reaching orgasm
4. Lots of lube and have your partner explore with tongue and fingers before, during and after intercourse.