The 10 things you absolutely need to know about to attract a life partner of quality.
At any given time in your community approximately 28% of the people out there are single and looking for love. You may be one of them. Or you may know one of them. Or you may be wanting to leave a relationship and become one of them. And if you haven’t been on the dating market for while you may be struggling with knowing how you should act or where you should start in the quest for love. Finding love takes work and clarity. You need to know what you are looking for in order to do the steps necessary to bring in the kind of person you will be compatible with. But the truth is that there are plenty of singles out there with whom you can create magic. Someone asked me this week about the road map for what they need to do in order to land a lover of the highest quality. The tricks of the trade so to speak.
There is no one size fits all in relationships (and the minute I start thinking that people fit into eharmony boxes of sameness then I am dead in the water). However there are some evolutionary biology rules that see to apply to us as a species. And the anthropologists have tried them out in a variety of different cultures with similar success. So here is the list of what potential partners find attractive.
1. People are attracted to, and remember strong emotion. Present something or develop something truly interesting about yourself. Raise chameleons, learn to play the ukelele, or take them to a haunted house. Your date will remember you. Anything that gets your adrenaline up is a great first date. Strong movie, ziplining, lasertag.
2. Ramp up your masculine or feminine features. If you want to create heat cultivate that day old stubble (if you are a man), or find those pantyhose with the seams down the back if you are a woman. The more you can exaggerate gender roles the hotter you will appear to be.
3. Show your neck. Both men and women find it sexy and it is also a sign of trust and trustworthiness. Also make excuses to touch their arm or shoulder. Study after study emphasizes touch as necessary pack ritual in picking a partner.
4. Make eye contact. The opposite sex (especially men) needs 11 contacts with eyes and smiles to make a solid connection.
5. Be vulnerable and self deprecating. I tell people to not to brag. Mention what a bad golfer you are, not that have a house in an exclusive neighborhood or drive a cool car.
6. Figure out a way to let a potential partner either wear your jacket or carry your jacket. The pheromones you put off will be concentrated and they will feel closer to you for the action.
7. Be happy, positive and interesting. This goes without saying but being positive and clean (think great oral hygiene) are two of the most significant qualities people want from a mate in the survey done at the University of Arizona.
8. Everybody is a Big Deal. What this means is that everyone wants attention. They want you to notice them and not be on their phone when you are spending time with them. Make whoever you are with feel important and special.
9. Play love songs in the car or house when you are entertaining a new person. bribe the staff at the coffee shop if you have to. Love songs makes us feel more romantic and connected to the person we are with.
10. People don’t fall in love with a person, they fall in love with how that person makes them feel. Meaning, work on being gracious and not too needy. Let a potential partner do things for you, and don’t think about all the things you can do for them.