Blow jobs…. Not the topic of conversation at most dinner parties, (except maybe some of the dinner parties I’ve been invited to recently…). I was thinking today about the etiquette of “being in a social situation with something in your mouth….”
I was reading Nicole Beland (one of the sex journalists at Men’s Health mag), when she spoke of how her significant other was “taking sips of his beer”, while, as she so delicately put it, “had her line of vision blocked”.
She goes onto say that as far as she’s concerned the only thing the receiver should be doing during a blow job is “rubbing your head, moaning, or saying your name out loud.” In my books, telling you are a Goddess works too.
I would go one step further. I too think watching the game, pushing down on the back of the head, and drinking beer or scarfing down pizza are all unacceptable, but I for one really appreciate feedback during the process. Comments like “harder, faster, don’t stop, just like that, oh thank you,” and the aforementioned goddess thing all help when you are hard at work. Gentle hand gestures also work if you are too tongue-tied at the moment to manage speech, but it reminded me that really good sex is about communication. As much as you can offer. Otherwise you are diminishing your own pleasure, and the pleasure your partner gets from your unbridled sensual delight.
Communication during oral sex is not just about a really great blow job, but is an example of how hard it is for most people to relax with their partner, ask for what they truly need, without taking them for granted. A hard line to walk, but it is this subtlety that makes good sex really elegant in my opinion. And it all but guarantees that you are going to get more of it. And that, may be a public service, because the world has to be a better place if more people are getting more oral sex. Smile.
