I have lately been doing more and more sexual hypnosis for individuals who have what I call “bad original sex programming”. Think of sexual thoughts and patterns that aren’t healthy or fit their model of the person they want to be. Examples are tormented Catholic boys who were told by Nuns that sex was dirty or unchristian-like. Or women who were programmed that “nice girls don’t”. Even with their loving husbands. Or men who are so fearful of catching a sexually transmitted infection that they can’t move forward and touch a medically cleared partner. I see individuals who never talked about sex in their families and who learned that there was something inherently bad about their sexuality.
Hypnosis has always seemed to have had a bad rap. The truth is that all hypnosis is self hypnosis. Meaning it’s only about accessing your lower programming, and only messages that you want in your head actually get through. So nobody can control you, or cause you to act like a chicken if you don’t want it. Which is why the most powerful subconscious psychology is when you speak to yourself with the messages you want to act out.
I studied reproductive medicine as well as psychology. For years, hypnosis was done only by MD’s (medical doctors). More and more psychologists and other professionals (and a few quacks) have turned to hypnosis to help people change behaviors and programming. As a sex therapist I see individuals who are frustrated with their sexual thoughts and feelings and want to change them. And I’ve seen some amazing changes. I’ve lost weight, my brother lost a great deal of weight, and I have too friends that have stopped smoking. With stopping smoking I’ve seen it where individuals who have been heavy smokers come out of a hypnosis session claiming it didn’t work. And yet they decided after leaving the session that they simply didn’t feel like a cigarette. It was only after weeks of not smoking that they admitted that maybe there was something to this hypnosis thing.
Changing the programming through hypnosis isn’t an exact science. As I say to my clients, there is no “one size fits all, especially around sexual responses”. The minute that I think that everyone is the same that’s the minute that I need to closed down shop. Everyone is unique. But if you can control the messaging, and get yourself relaxed enough to access the underlying programming then hypnosis is a fabulous tool.
Hypnosis is defined as “a scientifically verified and effective technique that can promote accelerated human change. With Hypnosis, we can create desired changes in behavior and encourage mental and physical well-being. Learn how to guide yourself and others to lose weight, quit smoking and be free of physical pain.”
While in a hypnotic state, your conscious mind (the mind you are reading and thinking with now) is temporarily by-passed and you gain access directly to your subconscious mind. Through hypnotherapy, your subconscious mind becomes highly receptive to positive suggestions and beneficial ideas; essentially re-educating yourself at a fundamental level. These suggestions are a combination of the goals you want to achieve, behaviors you want to change and a mind-set you want to develop. While under hypnosis you are still in control of your thoughts and actions, and will only accept suggestions and integrate changes that are appropriate for you; whether mentally, physically, spiritually or emotionally. It is a consensual state from which you can emerge at any time of your own choosing.
For specific sexual problems hypnosis (in my opinion) needs to be done by a trained sex therapist. Sex is close to the bone, or is where you are most vulnerable. In order for it to be effective you need to trust the provider or you will shut down and get no benefit form the session beyond a 15 minute relaxation exercise. Sexual hypnosis is you talking to you about the sex life you want to have. If there is something that you want to change about your sexual self why don’t we talk about it? It is likely covered by your health insurance plans and it will make a huge difference in your marriage, your intimate life, and how you view yourself. Send me a note now. We can likely have this fixed up within a week. It’s the same prices as my regular rate and I have a four visit program that will have you seeing some remarkable changes.
Trust yourself (and me) and give it a try. You’re worth it.
